And We're Back.

Well... It's been awhile now , hasn't it?
So much has happened so I'm going to touch on a bit of it but can't go in loads of detail.

1) I WENT TO RUSSIA!
- My life has forever been changed.
2) I'm a junior now and live off campus (but still in Belmar).
- I'm roomming with D,AD, and M. M and D are directs and then AD and I are together.
3) I had my first lice experience.
- Yeah... That was fun.
4) I'm a DGL as well as the Connections leader


Well... I'm probably going to talk again later because I have a lot on my heart but I don't know when and how to say it...

"Wherever you are, be all there." --Jenni W.

Trust and Grace

Sitting here in Starbucks... Listening to the random music that they have... Reminiscing over the last two semesters (mainly the last one). It's rainy and beautiful outside as Colorado gives us all a proper goodbye with her weather. The days of cleaning, studying, and stressing are over, along with the freedom of being in a different state -- now called home.

Out of the original 6, three have survived. Mel, Kat, and I look at each other and stand amazed at what God has brought us through. Dorie and Lucy have been blessings and the five of us have loved and worked together as well as disagreed. Alyssa has been picked up along the way: laughing, crying, and loving. The six of us have grown close and through it all God has taught each of us some hard lessons. He has shaped and formed us so that we can be closer to the person He wants us to be.

Trust in God. That simple thought, action, breath can be so hard. All of us have had to work on this aspect of faith this year to where it brings us to lean more heavily on our Father than we have in the past. For me it has been with J and healing from the semester as well as breaking up with B so I can be my own person. I need to figure out who God wants me to be and how I can still be that person when I'm by myself as well as with someone else.

He has also been working on Grace. Grace to others, grace to myself, and grace to situations. I love helping people with whatever they are doing especially for my friends or strangers (I guess that's everybody lol.) but the last few days it has been hard to accept it (and give grace) when people do not help me in return. I fight satan off when I feel like that but it is only by the grace of God that I can love people in that situation. Typically, it isn't a problem but every now-and- then, those thoughts creep up: I was a friend to you when you were in need... where are you now? Grace to myself has also been a lesson these 32 weeks. When I mess up or feel like I mess up, God keeps bringing in the fact that I need to love myself because He first loved me. It's a fact.

Well. That has been part of my year. California calls to girl in Colorado and so I go.
 To quote Lucy, "Be all that you can be and love doing it."

List.

Well now. It's Almost the end of April and that means the end of my Sophomore year is coming. This year has been interesting to say the least... I mean... A lot of changes but at the same time 2012 is going pretty well. Brian and I broke up and I'm trying to see what God has in store for my life. I'm struggling with it but at the same time I know that I'm doing the best I know and God provides the grace where I don't hear correctly or decide to follow my own will.

There are a few things I'm planning to do when I get home for the summer. OH! I forgot to let you know that I as headed to Russia... or at least I think that you don;t know. Well anyway. I'll be home for a few weeks where I will then be headed to Russia to teach conversational English while building my relationships and sharing God's love.

Back to what I was saying... When I get home I have some things that I want to get done/do. 1) Go to a Giants Game, working on that with Andrew. 2) Water skiing 3) Working and finish raising money 4) seeing VE, LM, AS, MM, TM, AN. 5) meet Jack for the first time and 6) Do something with Mum. That's it for now but there's still more time ;)

This picture is dinner that Kat and I made. It was real good and total random thought :)

Alrighty. I should get on to productive things....

I'm Home.

Spring Break is upon me and being back home is such a blessing but at the same time quite weird. I arrived back in Cali late/early at night/morning to sleep three hours only to up a tad disoriented in my brothers house and a trip up the mountain. We went snowmobiling that day with G1, J, and Ch. The five of us worked hard at play and enjoyed being in God's wonderful creation. (photos are still on my camera... there are some good ones) I then came home and had family dinner with everyone except C, N, and Jack.
A good nights sleep followed with a full day with Lauren driving to Fresno but what we were going to see was closed so we watched the Hunger Games , then went to La Mornita for dinner, concluded with a game of Janga and half of Kung Fo Panda II.
Today was a good day. I went to church and lunch; a nap was enjoyed but it was a little long for my liking. At 5:20 I went for a walk and took some more photos of God's beautiful creation called home and laid with Henry in the grass for a bit.
This short message was more about what I did but I need to try and keep this up better... I'm heading to Russia this summer and that'll be quite the adventure!
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So many thoughts....
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Here's a good song... At least it's been in my head for a long time.
For me, this song is an escape from school and city. It's my history and a desire for the future.
I'm so confused about what my future will hold. I know that God has a plan for me but it is soo hard not to take that into my own hands. I'm home. But this can't be my home for forever. My soul is in a tug of war. If I stay too long then I get restless but if I am gone I miss home. I see my future with a husband in the country with animals and God's love. BUT. I also see my life in Russia, with Children (orphanage?) , teaching, no husband, and God's love. I will always be a home bred, country girl, who loves the Lord, family, and land; who works well with children, animals, and adults, fails at making everyone happy but tries anyway, is tough and stubborn but with a heart the size of Russia and then some. Well... At least that's my hope and prayer.

Leap Year.

Today is a good day.
Steven Ericsson H. D. (A.K.A. Jack) was born on leap day at 6:22AM in Washington. 21 inches, 8.1 pounds and perfectly formed by God. C and N I'm so happy for you two and boy howdy, I'm excited to meet this child. This is the grumpy little man, my nephew:

This Song is how I'm feeling right now

LU

So obviously I haven't been keeping up with this here blog but I never promised to be devoted.

Well, I'm back at school and this semester promises to be a new adventure. F and LU are two new roommates after last semester being a crazy semester. My direct moved out and we were all wondering if I would get a new roommate. I was home free until the last day of break came along with a text from F about a new roommate - LU. To be honest I was not very happy but my brother A pointed about about taking life as an adventure and trusting God. I also talked more to F about it and she helped me accept and realize LU wasn't like my last. All of my fears and hurts came up but through my friends kind words and reminders, I came back to CO and now have started the new semester. LU is pretty great and super chill. We get along good I can see where I still have scares.

This morning I got a text from A which reminded me about this song and a little bit of home.